Random Musings...
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
·Stress Stress STRESS·
- I feel like a mess lately. There is so much to think about right now, and so many pressures are pushing on me. Being as hormonal as I am, I feel like I'm contantly on the brink of an enxiety attack and fighting to maintain some sanity.
Now that we know we're moving to Providence, the planning begins. We need to put our house up for sale, which means that we need to do all the little repairs and cosmetic touch-ups we've been putting off, like, now. We should probably have it officially for sale in the next two to three weeks so we can close by the time we leave in June. We have to figure out where we'll be moving so we know what we are able to take with us and what we can't. Chances are, we won't be able to afford rent on a 3-bedroom townhouse in New England! What we are taking, we'll have to figure out how to move it 1200 miles.
Oh yeah, and have our first baby in the meantime!
In addition to all of those stresses, my mom has been driving me absolutely insane. Just insane. She has always had control issues. Major issues. It was a horribly ugly battle between the two of us when I was a teenager, but once I moved out of the house, things got a little better. We still definitely have our blowouts, but I've learned to manage. I've learned what to do to keep the peace and still have my own life.
Now with her grandchild on the way, though, she has become impossible. She calls me five to six times a day, including one everyday around 8am to make sure I have felt the baby move. She wants to move in with us a week or two before my due date and stay with us for a few weeks after. This weekend is the shower she's been planning for months. It will be more elaborate than most weddings, including several custom-made, large decorations she hired various carpenters and artists to create.
My in-laws are driving down from NC for a short visit here before heading down to the shower. I told my mom that we'd make it there to Orlando bright and early Saturday morning (the shower is Sunday). She told me she wanted me to get there Friday night instead, but I told her that since Andrew's parents would be coming with us, that it'd be easier to just arrive first thing Saturday. So what does she do? She schedules me for a hair and nail appointment at the earliest possible time on Saturday morning. She called me and told me I now have to come Friday. I called the salon and asked them if they had anything later, and sure enough, they moved my appointments for 10:30am, which is not hard to make since we were planning on leaving early anyway. She was so mad that I did that after she was trying to make my life easy and make sure that I looked pretty for all of the pictures.
She has FLOODED us with baby stuff. I mean, we're just overwhelmed. We had more than 40 baby blankets and over a dozen baby towels. I wish I was exaggerating. I've asked her over and over and over and over to please cool down on the shopping and not get us more until after the shower, when she could help us instead with the things that we might be short on. She has completely ignored me, and everytime I see her (every week in January and every other week since then), I have another dozen items she's bought. Whenever I tell her I don't want so much, it becomes a huge fight about how ungrateful I am that I haven't had to spend a dime when we're in a difficult financial situation and how could I deny my own child all of these things she could have. It's always a blowout. Over and over and over.
And she was talking before we knew where we were going to move that she wanted to visit us every other week. I was really, really hoping that she'd realize that's a bit much, but now that we're moving to the farthest possible place, she's not discouraged. She's already researched which airlines fly to Providence from Orlando and is setting up a frequent flier program with them. She still plans to visit us every other week. Every other week. Whenever I start hinting that it may be excessive, she dismisses me and tells me that I'm going to welcome it because I have no idea how muc work a baby is.
And I casually mentioned just now to her that the doctor told me I'm ok to travel to check out Providence in the next several weeks if I choose. So she said to let her know so she can also book a flight so she can help us choose the right place to live. I told her that it was not a big deal, but she insisted that she help choose an apartment. (She still, for some reason, doesn't forgive us for having bought our current place without help)
Andrew is a reasonably independent person. Close to his family, but likes to make his own decisions. He is reaching a breaking point with my mom's overinvolvement. I keep telling him I'll talk to my mom, but every time I start, she won't have any of it. It's always a huge fight that always ends up with me being unappreciative of everything she does for me. I feel like I'm just about burst from the pressure. I can't bring up how Andrew feels, because she's always accusing him of trying to put as much distance between us as possible. I can't stand her demonizing Andrew, and I can't stand it when I have to say something that I know she is going to blow out of proportion (like the whole when do we show up for the shower thing...I told her that since Andrew's parents were coming into town, we were wanting to spend at least one night with them before heading down. Well, that is a sign of him pulling me away from my family and favoring his).
She is so paranoid about this distance thing that she told me every day how she prayed that Chapel Hill (our top choice) would reject Andrew so we wouldn't end up so close to his parents. She say it as a way of pushing her out. I told her over and over that wouldn't it be better for me to live close to someone while i'm adjusting to this new life than to live in a place where I won't know a single soul?? No, it's better to be far from them so she's not at a disadvantage. She wants us to move back to Orlando after this internship is done. When I tell her that there's no way in hell I could ever promise something like that, she says that they'll just move wherever we move.
Things are already just awful and unmanageable, and I'm terrified of what lies ahead when her grandchild is actually born. Will she ever realize how overbearing she's being without her making it out to mean that I'm pushing her out of my life? Will she let me be a mother to my own child? Will she let us have a life as our own family? I just don't know what's going to happen and what I need to do about it. I'm so fucking stressed I can't take it. I'm sick of fighting every day. I'm sick of having to spend so much time figuring out how to deal with what she is doing to us when I have so much already on my mind. She just can't listen to me. She just can't. I don't know what to do.
Posted at 3:52 PM
Comments... Oh wow I am so sorry to hear that!
I dont even know where to begin.
I agree with Christina to try and see if your dad can help. I understand the fact that you think that is alot every other week for her to come and visit. My sister lives about 5 hours away and my mom sees her about once a month. I would say I do as well. my mom is very laid back and helpful and very much aware my sister is their mother and her husband travels alot so my mom tries to visit when he is away to help my sister. My sister also comes home so really my mom is there about every other month and my sister comes home the other months so it equals to about once a month.
Also my mom is extremely generous almost too a fault...I know about the overwhelming about of stuff one could purchase, she respects us though and we rarely fight.
I would wait till the shower is through as not to make it tense for everyone because it is not going to change before that. From there I would just state your feelings and let her know that you need her to back off it is stressful on you, on your marriage on Anna. You want her involved but you dont want to always have it be a battle.
Good Luck and hang in there I am thinking about you! I hope only good things and it will all work out.
There is a beautiful baby at the end of all this!
Post a Commentoh rosalie!
i'm so sorry to hear that on top of all of your other stressors you have to deal with parental issues as well. I oftentimes think it is a parents job to drive their children batty.
I'm hoping that you and her will be able to come to an agreement. I know it's hard, but perhaps you can somehow tactfully convey to your mother that her being so overly involved is actually the catalyst in pushing you away. Make sure you let her know that you appreciate her and what she does, but that you ARE, in fact, an adult now, and fully capable of making decisions on your own and more importantly, with your husband. You and your husband are the team and YOUR family comes first. Not hers. It sucks to have to say it like that, but it's the truth.
Why it has to be a CONTEST really makes me concerned for you and more importantly for her. Not only is she making you feel terrible (you can never win), but having that mentality, must be making her horribly upset as well .
It sounds like a Dr. Phil moment. ;-)
That being said, (and I agree with what flutter and christina said too about asking for your dad to step in), perhaps you can tactfully convey that she is irreversibly damaging her relationship with you and with your family.
I want to suggest going and talking to a professional WITH your mom, but that might be overkill.
I hope that you can figure things out, because I would hate to see your relationship with your mother get worse.
Melanie
P.S. Manipulation is a horrible, awful, selfish thing. I'm very proud of you for taking control of your hair/nails appointment and not allowing her to manipulate your weekend to her will.
I say you make your appointment at a different salon altogether at an even LATER time. I'm horrible, but it's what I would do. Stupidly passive agressive. Never mind. Do not do that.
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Monday, February 27, 2006
·Providence at a Glance·
- I found some gorgeous pictures of Providence and the surrounding areas online. It looks just beautiful!
Providence
Rhode Island
Posted at 5:38 PM
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·The Wait is Over·
- Our future home is in Providence, Rhode Island. Wow.
Check out what the weather is there, by the way.
But, it's a great program. I mean, Brown University. How cool is that? And I've heard the city of Providence is a great one.
I can't believe it's settled. That's it. Rhode Island. That and Maine are the only states on the east coast that I've never been to!
Posted at 8:17 AM
Comments... Congratulations!!! I've always wanted to visit the coastline of Rhode Island and Maine. It looks gorgeous. How's the cost of living?
Posted by: 10:55 AM
Post a CommentCost of living is the highest of any of the places we applied. I can't find rent under $1000 really. I could even find several decent places for less than that in Philadelphia. We've been spoiled here in G'ville with our super low mortgage too.
It really is gorgeous there, though, from what I've seen online. I'm about to post some photos in another post.
And yes, Spikey, congratulations! We're excited now. We were just in shock. We were hoping for North Carolina, but really, this is the top one or two program in the country for what Andrew wants to do. He's so smart!
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Wednesday, February 22, 2006
·Bright, Blue, Sunny Day·
- I've had a nice string of sales lately. It's pretty nice when things are rolling along like that. The store I've been working with rearranged everythiing and my stuff is in a very prominent spot now. The owner also asked me to add a few more samples to the display. Things are looking good!
Little Anna has hiccups right now. She gets them a few times a day. It's usually pretty cute. Sometimes I'm terrified and May seems to be rumbling toward me at break-neck speeds. Other times, I get pretty excited. I'm not looking forward to the first couple of weeks, but whenever I see a little girl lately, I can't help but smile. It's incredible to think how different my life is going to be. At Bobby's this weekend, the neighbors across the street were out in the yard every day playing with their two girls. One day, the dad was tossing a Nerf football with them. The next, they were in their bathing suits and jumping around a toy sprinkler. It was so heartwarming. Sometimes I only think of the things I won't be able to do with my weekends anymore. No more being lazy, no more going out with friends whenever we feel like it. But little scenes like that made me realize what I AM getting instead.
Posted at 2:42 PM
Comments... After a few months you are able to get back out there with friends, I live for those days where I dress my kid up and show her off to all the girls!!!
Congratulations on the sales!
I really love the name Anna. Especially combined with Andrew's last name. It has a nice flow ;-)
Posted by
Post a CommentThis reminds me of the scene in "Father of the Bride-Part II" when Annie and George are driving home from the OB-GYN and all Annie sees is the good moments and skipping along, and then George sees the kids yelling and screaming at their parents, lol.
Wes and I are totally that scene right there, but I just need to give him 3 years, and hopefully he'll be excited, too.
You and Andrew are going to be such great parents!!
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Monday, February 20, 2006
·Hormonal Again·
- I've been fighting tears since yesterday. It's always a different reason. First, I got all depressed about my brother. We had a great time visiting him this weekend for his birthday. We got to meet his friends and things like that. It was nice. I don't know. It's hard to explain why I got depressed about it all, but I did. And I still feel like crying about it.
Last night I was choking back tears because I was so bitchy to Andrew when he was driving me to Wendy's to fill my salad craving. He missed the turn, and I was like "What the hell is wrong with you?" and stupid things like that. I got so upset about how badly I was treating him, even though he was doing me a favor the entire time.
Then, I just found out today that my friends are planning a surprise shower for me. I'm so very upset that I found out. I've never had a surprise party before, and I definitely would have been completely surprised. Several of them are coming to the one my mom is throwing for me down in Orlando, so I never would have expected that they would want to throw me another one. I'm so upset that I found out that I've been on the verge of tears for hours.
I don't know. I need one huge cry about all these things, because my throat is beginning to hurt from the pressure.
Posted at 4:34 PM
Comments... After you have the baby, and get past those first few hard months you really are going to look back and say "who was this tearful hormonal monster??? Was that really me???"
Truth: It will only get worse before it gets better....
Truth: after the bad part things are sunshine and roses!!! Life will be full of fun things, you will be on cloud nine and feel like you will never ever love anything as much as you do this child. It's all WELL WORTH IT!!! Cry your eyes out all you need to. It's a long road to get there, and not an easy road to take. Tears are just a part of it, and it feels good to let out a good cry now and then
Post a CommentWelcome the the Wild World of the Hormonal Pregnancy.
You're normal.
Crying is good and so is a big bowl of chocolate ice cream.
Seriously though my SIL was a psycho when she was knocked up and if you feel that it's just regular hormones, ride it out. If you think it's more, let your doctor know you're a woman on the edge and s/he can help you out.
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Thursday, February 16, 2006
·Welcome to the Third Trimester!·
- I've been neglecting my belly shots lately, so here's the latest update at exactly 29 weeks, the beginning of my third trimester. Now that's definitely a pregnant belly!
Posted at 9:28 AM
Comments... You are having a girl right?? Hmmmm by the looks of you here and Mrs... Im beginning to think so are we! 26 weeks here. You look great!
Post a CommentWow! I just love how tiny you are every place except the belly!!! So cute. Do you really only have 11 weeks before baby time>?
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Wednesday, February 15, 2006
·Way Back Wednesday·
- Today's Way Back Wednesday topic is cheesy boyfriend pictures of the past. Well, thanks to the massive reorganization of my old memorabilia, I know exactly where each and every photograph I possess is in this house. Unfortunately, I don't exactly have a massive relationship history. I went on a lot of dates in college, but real boyfriends, well, never had many of those. I only kissed three boys in my life (which explains why so many first and second dates and not too many after that!).
So, without further ado, I present to you my first boyfriend...
If it looks like we don't like each other very much in this picture, well, you're right. We had just broken up two days before. Why are we posing here on our way to the Homecoming dance? Ha! Ok, I never had had any dates really before this. The boy (we'll call him P) was the first boy I ever went out with. We were together maybe two months. Anyway, my mom was just simply overjoyed that I was about to go on my first "real date" ever. We had gone out a couple of weeks earlier to buy this awesome dress (it was the 90's, people, give me a break!). She ordered me the flowers to put on his lapel. She made my hair appointment. It was all in place, and she was so excited her little girl was finally all grown up at the age of 17. (Yeah, I definitely missed the 16-and-Never-Been-Kissed-Deadline by well over a year!) So yeah, two days before the Homecoming dance, P dumps me. I was so upset and why, I don't know, but I was way too humiliated to tell my mom that everything we had done to get ready for this exciting event was for nothing. I got dumped big time. Well, instead of swallowing my pride to my mom, I decided to swallow my pride to P and asked him if he would still go to the dance with me. God, thinking back to it, I can't believe I did that! But yep, there we are. And here's a little photo session my parents had for me in my whole formal get-up before P showed up.
See that redness in my eyes? I pretended it was the mascara iritating me, but, well, we now know what it really was! P and I went out to a nice dinner where we hardly talked, showed up at the dance for maybe an hour, and then came back home. My dad was delighted with P for having me back so promptly. *sigh*
Geez, too many of these WBW end up bringing up bad memories for me! Onto much happier photos, here are pictures of Andrew and I in our early courtship and completely enamored by each other to the point of nausea. Enjoy!
Posted at 3:01 PM
Comments... Post a CommentOK...I like the dress, is that wrong?
The guy, I'm sure, was a dick.
LOL about the "enamored by each other..." part, I totally can relate.
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·House·
- Here's me posing with the most beautiful dessert I've ever created. I brought it over to a friends house this past weekend when they invited us to dinner. It was pretty tasty too.
However, the thing I notice most about this picture is that, wow, I am as big as a house! I haven't taken any belly pictures lately. I'll do that at some point today.
Posted at 9:16 AM
Comments... Post a Comment
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Monday, February 13, 2006
·Passing Anxiety·
- Sometimes I float day to day not stressing out about anything at all. I have a healthy baby inside of me who I already love like crazy. I have a husband who I know is going to be the best father I could ever give my child. Life is good.
But then...holy hell. What on Earth are we going to do??? Our bank account keeps shrinking, we have a baby one day and that starts the beginning of a lifelong responsibility until the day I go to my grave, and we have to move to a totally new city in another state the following month. We have to pack everything. I have to make money. We have to sell the house. We have to find a place to live next year. I'm in my third trimester already. Geez! It's so friggin' much. I don't know how we're going to make it sometimes.
And then, I forget about it because it's too much to think about. I would have spontaneously combusted by now if I kept thinking about it. I don't know if it's the best thing to do or not, of course, since in the meantime our bank account continues to shrink and our stuff continues not to be packed and we continue not to have things ready for the baby. Wow. But for now, whatever...
Posted at 4:44 PM
Comments... Post a CommentBreathe, honey. You'll be fabulous and you'll just do it all. I know that sounds stupid, but when the time comes...you'll be ready (to move, to work, to push that sucker out, etc.) and it will all feel natural...
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·A Moment of Silence·
- After all this seriousness and grief, I figured it was time to grieve over something a little lighter.
In what appears to be the beginning of nesting, I decided to reorganize my entire bedroom and all of my boxes of photos and keepsakes. I came across many, many sentimental things. Notes from my grandfathers, photos of old friends, etc. The thing that made me stop in my tracks more than anything was a picture I found of my dad, Andrew and I at the beach a couple of years ago.
Ladies and gentlemen, a moment of silence, please, for the body I used to have which will never, ever be back again...
Posted at 11:20 AM
Comments... HAHAHA!!!! Don't worry Rosalie. I bet you're gonna be one of those b*tches (like momma duck) who continues to have a kick a$$ body even after giving birth.
PS - I say b*tches in the most loving way possible ;-D
Posted by
I would love to say good things like "it's easy to lose baby weight and Oh you'll be skinny in no time" however, for me that was not the case....30 pounds bigger then I was, dimples in my butt. the good news is I could't be happier....I have a baby who needs a hot bod anyways?
Post a CommentHey! I just saw that, Cori!!! ;)
I swear to God that at any moment I'm going to stop stalking you and commenting on every post...but wowza woman! Ya hottie!!!!!
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Thursday, February 09, 2006
·Back to Normal·
- Well, I've been waiting since before Christmas for my life to return back to normal. Andrew finally finished with all of his interviews and conferences and got back home for good on Saturday, but then the whole thing with Alex threw us for a loop and we were all scrambling again. Hopefully from now on, we'll have a little more stability. I'm trying to catch up on all the phone calls and emails I hadn't gotten around to in a while. I got some new orders for the business that I'm working on, and my doctor's appointment yesterday went great. I'll now be going in every two weeks to make sure the baby is growing appropriately. So far, she is perfectly on track. My weight gain has been a little on the heavy side, but my doctor does not seem to be bothered by it. I've gained 22 lbs since August out of the 30 I'm supposed to gain total for my body type. I'm probably going to surpass that at this rate, but it's not out of hand. Now that my back is better with the physical therapy I've been going to, I'm going to try and start exercising.
I'm trying not to dwell on it, but I found that his school paper has a whole section of articles, photos, and editorials on Alex.. I never know what to tell people when they ask me how we are related. My family is so gigantic, but we got together very often, so I do know almost everyone. I've always called him a cousin, even though he's not one of my immediate 11 cousins. His dad is my dad's cousin. I always called him an uncle, just like I call all my dad's cousins and uncles my own uncles too. The big joke for all my friends is that I have an uncle who has done everything because I have so very many "uncles," though only really four in the most literal sense of the word. Anyway, I have hesitated to call Alex a cousin in all of this recently, even though that was always what I called him. I didn't want to give the impression that he was one of the ones I see ALL of the time, like my immediate cousins. Since leaving for college, I only saw him maybe once every other year, more often when I was living at home. My dad and Tio Joey are pretty close and get together often. Since my brother lived at home until this past year, he continued to see Alex pretty often. Whenever Tio Joey and Titi Mariangel came to Orlando, they stayed at my parents' house, and Alex and Bobby would share a room and play video games late into the night.
Anyway, I don't know if my grief over Alex would seem overblown to some. He wasn't "really" my cousin, and last time I saw him was maybe two years ago. Still, I feel we grew up together in that I remember him as a tiny little kid running around at all the big family events. I always heard about what he was up to through my dad. He was truly a great kid, and I knew him well enough to know that everything written in that article is absolutely true. He always had a smile on his face. He was a deep-down, genuinely good person. When someone has passed, people tend to shower them with so many compliments about how great they were. With Alex, I know everything that has been said about him has been true. He was the saint child among us all, the kid who was good at everything and loved by everyone. He is the first of my generation of 90+ "cousins" to pass away. He seemed so pure. I can't help but feel an overwhelming desire to give him a big hug farewell.
I didn't mean to write this much again. I guess I just need to get it all out before I feel I can move on. Anyway, I felt like posting this picture from our wedding of us being married by Tio Joey. He and Alex look so much alike! I remember Alex at the wedding and how proud he was to see his dad perform his first ceremony.
Posted at 8:40 AM
Comments... Post a CommentI am so sorry to hear about your loss. I am reading your blog today and feel so very sad (last year I had a very similar death in my family...I know how hard it can be) I am praying for you...
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Wednesday, February 08, 2006
·Way Back Wednesday·
- I haven't played Way Back Wednesday since before the holidays. Ironically enough, today's topic is people we have lost in our lives. The obvious first pick is Alex since he was just buried yesterday at such a tragically young age. Read the post I made earlier today for the full story on this.
The other young person I have lost in my life was the last day of my sophomore year of college. I took my last final and hurried on board a plane to meet my family in Indiana for my dad's 25th High School reunion. That night in the hotel room, I got a call from one of my friends. Our friend Nick had died at the age of 19. I had done two mainstage shows with Nick. He was my scene partner that semester in Acting II. He once talked me into playing a drinking game with him to the Police's "Roxanne" even though he was drinking beer and I was drinking whiskey. He sipped every Roxanne, and I sipped every "Put out the red light." The group of us had a late night Denny's habit that was hard to break. One night after a Denny's run, we were driving home around 2 or 3am and were stunned at how many stars had filled up the sky. He told us to pull over into a field to take it all in. We ran out there and frolicked in the tall grass and chilly air. He told us to throw our heads back, pick a star, and spin around that start until we fell. There were five of us, carefree, spinning ourselves into oblivion under the infinite sky. That last day of our sophomore year, he had an allergic reaction to something he ate and died within two hours. I know I have several pictures of us together, but none on my computer. I have notes from him that he wrote to me on opening nights. If I weren't so pregnant right now, I'd finally decide to get them out of the box and scan them. Eventually I'll do that. For now, a yearbook picture will have to do...
I have also lost both of my grandfathers. My mom's father died my junior year of college. He had contracted Hepatitis while in the Spanish army during the Civil War there, and it finally caught up to him in his mid-70's. He was still the most brilliant person I have ever met without a doubt. He was truly something. I'm ashamed to say I don't have pictures of him here in my house. I keep meaning to get more pictures from my parents.
My dad's father died in 2002 after struggling with his health for several years. I was closest to him since I used to spend my entire summers as a kid at his house. He was the one that took me all over the world. Here is a picture of him, my grandmother, my cousin Jennifer and I (at the age of 11) on our very first overseas trip ever. We are in Rome eating at the famous Alfredo di Roma (as in THE fettucine Alfredo).
One of the most special things about my wedding was that he was able to make it. Not only that, but he actually got up from his seat and danced with me.
My favorite picture of him at the wedding, though, is this one. My grandparents are saying goodbye to me and giving me one last word of advice and congratulations on my big day. The look of love in his face is one I will treasure for the rest of my life. Thank you, Ito!
Posted at 1:19 PM
Comments... Post a CommentI think it's truly special that you will always have that memory of your grandfather dancing at your wedding. I hope you always remember him this way.
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·Alex·
- Well, we're back from our whirlwind trip to Miami for Alex's funeral. It was completely surreal. We arrived to the funeral home Tuesday night in time for the end of the wake. The room was packed with family and friends, and the casket was open. It was so weird to see such a young person laying in a coffin, let alone a young relative of mine who looked exactly the same as the last time I had spent time with him. He and my brother were two peas in a pod whenever they got together, and seeing my brother stand over him as he lay there, rather than going on and on for hours about video games, was a shock to my system.
Still worse was greeting the grieving parents and grandparents who never expected that they'd ever have to do anything like this in their lifetime. The cause of death is still not exactly known. There are no lesions or trauma anywhere inside his body. No brain aneurism, no heart deformity, no burst appendix. Absolutely nothing. The current diagnosis is SDS, Sudden Death Syndrome, which is basically just a medical name for What-The-Fuck. He had gone to the doctor three days earlier and was diagnosed with the flu. He started feeling better after getting some rest, and went to class. He felt a little worse afterward and decided to go home and take a nap rather than go to his next class (the initial story I got wasn't totally accurate). His roommate came back and thought it was a bit weird that he was laying there so silently. Eventually, he realized that he wasn't breathing and called 911. Apparently, he just died in his sleep. The two freak possibilities up to this point are that the virus got into his brain and shut down the part where it tells his heart to keep beating, or he coughed or something like that and his heart stopped and never got going again. Both scenarios, obviously, are completely freakish, one-in-a-million type of things. They did an analysis on the virus in his system and are waiting on the results, but chances are, it won't answer any questions. He just plain died a week after turning 20.
The funeral was hard. I've never seen such an enormous funeral in my life. The procession across Miami from the church to the cemetary was the longest string of cars I had ever seen and traffic was cut off to the Palmetto Expressway for several minutes while we made our way. I'm not used to seeing so many young people at a funeral unless they're relatives. All these people lost a friend. It was, of course, especially hard to see his parents and his brothers grieve like that because it seemed so needless. Such a freak, tiny glitch caused this horrible consequence that they will live with for the rest of their lives. Since he is a deacon (our wedding was the first official ceremony he ever presided over), Joey, Alex's dad, was the one to sprinkle him with holy water. Each member of the immediate family placed a small rose on the top of the coffin, and it was lowered down. And just like that, he was gone. There was not a dry eye to be seen, young and old, friend and relative. It just seemed like it shouldn't be happening and none of us should have to be there where we were. Not that losing him to cancer, a car accident, drugs, or anything else would have made it ok, but it would have made it easier to grasp. Every person there, and there were hundreds, was wondering why the hell we were there and no one had an answer. These things just never happen, but there we all were.
Obituary
Breaking News article at his school reporting the death.
Article from his school's paper about the service held there at the school.
Posted at 12:10 PM
Comments... Post a CommentWow.
It sounds like perhaps he had meningitis? I had a friend in college who was diagnosed with the "flu" and died in his dorm room b/c of a misdiagnosis.
I feel for his parents.
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Monday, February 06, 2006
·Quick Post·
- Just a quick post to say our Super Bowl party was fantastic last night. WE had approximately 20 people over. Though the game was pretty lame in the first half, it was still tons of fun. There was so much food and beer and most of it was gone by the end of the night. This was probably our last large bash in who knows how long, and we ended with a bang.
Unfortunately, we are heading down to Miami in a few hours for a funeral. Andrew and I were married by my dad's cousin. Well, this past Friday, his teenage son died very unexpectedly. He was in class and started feeling ill. He left early and went to the doctor and just died right there. Just awful. He had no history of anything wrong. I assume I'll know a little better today what happened to him, but as far as we know, it was one of those completely out of the blue, freak things. So sad. The entire family is in shock. I'll be back late tomorrow night.
Tell someone you care about that you love them today!
Posted at 7:42 AM
Comments... Saw your post on nancies and came over to the blog to see how you are. your family is in my prayers....
Post a CommentI'm so sorry for your loss. How old was he? Let me know if it was his heart. My boss specializes in stuff like that & it's hereditary.
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Wednesday, February 01, 2006
·Top Four·
- Out of the list of nine potential internship sites, Andrew has narrowed his rankings into two tiers.
Top Tier
Chapel Hill, NC (UNC)
Philadelphia, PA (U Penn)
Providence, RI (Brown)
Baltimore, MD (Johns Hopkins)
Second Tier
Durham, NC (Duke)
Birmingham, AL (U Alabama)
Gainesville, FL (UF)
Columbus, OH (OSU)
Miami, FL (U of Miami)
Since we all know how fantastic Andrew is, I'm pretty certain we'll end up in one of his top choices. He's not exactly sure quite yet how he'll rank those top four (the match process is based on a ranking system) but those four will be the top. So I will be living in one of those four places. NC would be best in terms of livability. We can afford a nicer place and I know and love the area already. The others would be an adventure, though! If only those other places were a bit cheaper, I wouldn't feel so nervous about it. Can you imagine me living up North??
Posted at 5:14 PM
Comments... Post a CommentBALTIMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wes and I are most likley moving to the DC area (*crossing fingers* if he gets this job!) and I'm a great babysitter ;o)
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